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Visiting Australia? This is funny enough to share!



 
 
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  #1  
Old March 25th, 2005, 06:16 PM
Tammy Oetken
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default Visiting Australia? This is funny enough to share!

Visiting Australia????
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
----

These are inquiries from potential visitors posted on an Australian Tourism
Website. The answers are the actual responses by the website officials, who
obviously have a snide sense of humor.

Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia? I have never seen it rain on TV, so
how do the plants grow? (UK).
A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them
die.

Q: Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? (USA)
A: Depends how much you've been drinking.

Q: I want to walk from Perth to Sydney - can I follow the railroad tracks?
(Sweden)
A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles, take lots of water.

Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Australia? (Sweden)
A: So it's true what they say about Swedes.

Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Australia? Can you send me a list
of them in Brisbane, Cairns, Townsville and Hervey Bay? (UK)
A: What did your last slave die of?

Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Australia? (USA)
A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe.
Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the Pacific which does
not...oh, forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Kings
Cross. Come naked.

Q: Which direction is North in Australia? (USA)
A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and
we'll send the rest of the directions.

Source and more Q: & A:'s at:
http://www.forumgarden.com/forums/showthread.php?t=4303


  #2  
Old March 25th, 2005, 08:10 PM
Biffa Bacon
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default

"Tammy Oetken" wrote in message
...
Visiting Australia????
----------------------------------------------------------------------------


Heh. thats soooo funny, I've never seen that before ....... NOT !


  #3  
Old March 25th, 2005, 08:10 PM
Biffa Bacon
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default

"Tammy Oetken" wrote in message
...
Visiting Australia????
----------------------------------------------------------------------------


Heh. thats soooo funny, I've never seen that before ....... NOT !


  #4  
Old March 26th, 2005, 02:05 AM
Alan S
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default

On Fri, 25 Mar 2005 10:16:10 -0800, "Tammy Oetken"
wrote:

|Visiting Australia????
|----------------------------------------------------------------------------
|----
|
|These are inquiries from potential visitors posted on an Australian Tourism
|Website. The answers are the actual responses by the website officials, who
|obviously have a snide sense of humor.
|
|Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia? I have never seen it rain on TV, so
|how do the plants grow? (UK).
|A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them
|die.
|
|Q: Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? (USA)
|A: Depends how much you've been drinking.
|
|Q: I want to walk from Perth to Sydney - can I follow the railroad tracks?
|(Sweden)
|A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles, take lots of water.
|
|Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Australia? (Sweden)
|A: So it's true what they say about Swedes.
|
|Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Australia? Can you send me a list
|of them in Brisbane, Cairns, Townsville and Hervey Bay? (UK)
|A: What did your last slave die of?
|
|Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Australia? (USA)
|A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe.
|Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the Pacific which does
|not...oh, forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Kings
|Cross. Come naked.
|
|Q: Which direction is North in Australia? (USA)
|A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and
|we'll send the rest of the directions.
|
|Source and more Q: & A:'s at:
|http://www.forumgarden.com/forums/showthread.php?t=4303
|

You forgot the warning to be careful of drop bears. Most important.


Cheers, Alan, Australia
  #5  
Old March 26th, 2005, 02:05 AM
Alan S
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default

On Fri, 25 Mar 2005 10:16:10 -0800, "Tammy Oetken"
wrote:

|Visiting Australia????
|----------------------------------------------------------------------------
|----
|
|These are inquiries from potential visitors posted on an Australian Tourism
|Website. The answers are the actual responses by the website officials, who
|obviously have a snide sense of humor.
|
|Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia? I have never seen it rain on TV, so
|how do the plants grow? (UK).
|A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them
|die.
|
|Q: Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? (USA)
|A: Depends how much you've been drinking.
|
|Q: I want to walk from Perth to Sydney - can I follow the railroad tracks?
|(Sweden)
|A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles, take lots of water.
|
|Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Australia? (Sweden)
|A: So it's true what they say about Swedes.
|
|Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Australia? Can you send me a list
|of them in Brisbane, Cairns, Townsville and Hervey Bay? (UK)
|A: What did your last slave die of?
|
|Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Australia? (USA)
|A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe.
|Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the Pacific which does
|not...oh, forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Kings
|Cross. Come naked.
|
|Q: Which direction is North in Australia? (USA)
|A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and
|we'll send the rest of the directions.
|
|Source and more Q: & A:'s at:
|http://www.forumgarden.com/forums/showthread.php?t=4303
|

You forgot the warning to be careful of drop bears. Most important.


Cheers, Alan, Australia
  #6  
Old March 26th, 2005, 02:42 PM
Gerrit 't Hart
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default


"Alan S" wrote in message
...
On Fri, 25 Mar 2005 10:16:10 -0800, "Tammy Oetken"
wrote:

|Visiting Australia????

|---------------------------------------------------------------------------
-
|----
|
|These are inquiries from potential visitors posted on an Australian

Tourism
|Website. The answers are the actual responses by the website officials,

who
|obviously have a snide sense of humor.
|
|

You forgot the warning to be careful of drop bears. Most important.


Cheers, Alan, Australia



Check them out on: http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Forum/3695/db.htm

Gerrit - Oz


  #7  
Old March 26th, 2005, 02:42 PM
Gerrit 't Hart
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default


"Alan S" wrote in message
...
On Fri, 25 Mar 2005 10:16:10 -0800, "Tammy Oetken"
wrote:

|Visiting Australia????

|---------------------------------------------------------------------------
-
|----
|
|These are inquiries from potential visitors posted on an Australian

Tourism
|Website. The answers are the actual responses by the website officials,

who
|obviously have a snide sense of humor.
|
|

You forgot the warning to be careful of drop bears. Most important.


Cheers, Alan, Australia



Check them out on: http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Forum/3695/db.htm

Gerrit - Oz


 




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