How do I avoid looking and acting American while traveling in Europe?

"jos boersema" wrote in message
...
(Mean Mr Mustard) wrote:
snip
10. Little Canadian flag lapel pin - Last resort, but I think the
Europeans would just assume I'm an American trying to fool them with a
little Canadian flag pin.

Any other suggestions?

11. At least TRY to know your own way around before you ask "can you
help me, I'm an American". Buy a good map, buy a compass.

That's all well and good, but European cities don't have things like a
street that heads West. The block system doesn't apply.

Trouble is, that's as much a problem with directions as with maps.

....
23. Be polite. If someone helps you that is just out of his goodness,
and not your right to demand as "an American". Try to show you
appreciate
the trouble someone is putting in for you by trying to limit that
trouble: pay close attention when people talk to you. Don't over do
the
thank-you's afterwards.

Americans are polite, in their own terms (of course, that means something
different in NY to NM).

In fact, most people are polite. They just seem rude to people who come from
somewhere else.

24. Figure out in which parts of Europe waiters expect a tip and in which
they don't, and how much. In Holland it is not costume, though it will
be appreciated.

Nobody objects to being tipped, except sometimes the police.

....

J/

SOTW: "Shake Some Action" - The Flaming Groovies

I always see Canadians wearing a back pack with a HUGE maple leaf patch sewn
on the back. Meaning, "I'm a white Anglo, even though I have no European
accent I'm and NOT AMERICAN."

After all, Canadians are European, not North Americans. Just look at there
money.

God save the queen!

--


http://home.earthlink.net/~harp357/

"A noble spirit embiggens the smallest man."
- Jebidiah Springfield
______________________________________
All outgoing messages scanned to be virus free
by NIS 2004.


"Mean Mr Mustard" wrote in message
m...
Unfortunately, I drew the short straw and will be heading to Europe on
a business trip this summer. Now my primary concern is just making
sure I get through this trip and back to the US safely in one piece.
I figure this will be a challenging task with all the reports of
anti-American protests and assaults on American tourists.

That said I'm trying to compile a list of tactics that will prevent me
from being a target:

1. Never dress casual - I figure most Americans can be spotted a mile
away by something "wrong" with their wardrobe. Tailored English suit
should help keep me out of trouble.
2. No shouting or raised voices - Always speak at a level tone
3. Show no emotion - No laughing, no smiling, no signs of frustration
or desperation.
4. Do not leave the hotel except for business - When the business
meetings are over, head straight back to the hotel and stay there.
5. No American greetings - "Hey", "Hi", "Howdy" and "Yo" are banned.
6. No hand gestures when talking - especially no pointing
7. Walk upright; do not flail arms too wildly when walking.
8. "Bob's Your Uncle" - Rumor has it that this phrase will stop an on
coming mob of hooligans in their tracks but I haven't confirmed this?
9. Correct words - "petrol" instead of "gas" or "fag" instead of
"cigarrette"
10. Little Canadian flag lapel pin - Last resort, but I think the
Europeans would just assume I'm an American trying to fool them with a
little Canadian flag pin.

Any other suggestions?

"Turlough" wrote in message
...
pencil wrote:


Lose about 25 stones.


If the average Yank lost 25 stone, he'd fall through his arsehole and
hang himself. 20 years ago or so, I spotted a McDonalds in Dublin. I
recall saying to my wife, "Give them a generation or two, and the
Europeans will be sporting the huge arses they accuse us of." I should
have taken up fortune telling...


Turlough


snickle

"Rick" wrote in message
...
I'll just be me wherever I go.
"Be what you is, not what you is not." :-)

"I've just gotta be me!"

"Padraig Breathnach" wrote in message
news
Turlough wrote:

If the average Yank lost 25 stone, he'd fall through his arsehole and
hang himself. 20 years ago or so, I spotted a McDonalds in Dublin. I
recall saying to my wife, "Give them a generation or two, and the
Europeans will be sporting the huge arses they accuse us of." I should
have taken up fortune telling...

So you suggest that it is McDonald's that are responsible?

--
The fat asses don't take responsibility. The lawyers take the cases.
McDonalds takes the hit.

BfB

"Madra Dubh" wrote in message
...

"Turlough" wrote in message
...
Padraig Breathnach wrote:
Turlough wrote:


If the average Yank lost 25 stone, he'd fall through his arsehole and
hang himself. 20 years ago or so, I spotted a McDonalds in Dublin. I
recall saying to my wife, "Give them a generation or two, and the
Europeans will be sporting the huge arses they accuse us of." I should
have taken up fortune telling...


So you suggest that it is McDonald's that are responsible?


Not McDonald's per se, but the entire American diet. The results of
studies on 2nd and 3rd generation Oriental-Am's has shown that the
change to a western diet was a leading factor in increased cases of
obesity and diabetes among that group. Urbanization, which usually leads
to a decrease in normal daily exercise, and poverty are also relevant
factors.

But also increased height, Turlough, at least among the Japanese.
Must have something to do with good red meat.

Yao Ming may disagree. (or was that Ming Yao?)

BfB

"On-Liner" wrote in message
...

"Stephen Glynn" wrote
On-Liner wrote:

"JohnT" wrote

15. Order beer in McDonalds, NOT coffee.


Wrong way round.

UK McD's don't serve beer.

Mind you, they barely serve edible food either - or is that McD's in
general?



They do, or so I'm told, sell beer in some French and German McD's.
I've never tested the truth of this since they sell beer in lots of
other places in France and Germany, too.


Probably. It's just the UK where the Government is stupid enough to think
that it's fine to drink beer in the half of the building designated as a
bar
but not in the other half because it's designated as a food retailer. You
know, like it makes a difference.

.
It's to keep the brawling away from the kiddies.

BfB

"Madra Dubh" wrote in message
...

"Rick" wrote in message
...
I'll just be me wherever I go.
"Be what you is, not what you is not." :-)

"I've just gotta be me!"


What else could I be, but, what, I, am.

BfB

"westprog" wrote in message
...

"Magda" wrote in message
...
On Sun, 06 Jun 2004 17:41:48 +0100, in rec.travel.europe, Stephen Glynn
arranged some electrons, so they looked
like
this :

...
... Don't try to confuse Americans by using metric. Twenty five stone
=
350lb.
...
... Steve

I'm always amazed that they count the *time* like the rest of us...

They don't. Notice how it's 9/11, not 11/9.


That is because it IS 9/11.

BfB

What do you mean look at our money?
We are N American bud. However we are international in scope.
I do not feel it necessary to wear a pin. I just ry to speak as much of
the local language as possible.
It is not the nationality, it is the concept of respecting where you are
that is important.
My German is not great but I tired in Berlin. My French a lot better and I
spent a week in Nice mostly in French. I was not trying to be a tourist. I
was acting as if I lived in the place I stayed.

We happen to like our money. Have you checked our 100, 5 and 10 notes? You
will see previous Pirme Ministers.
Maybe you have never been to Canada as you certainly need some lessons

Vive le Canada!

"Cletus" wrote in message
ink.net...
I always see Canadians wearing a back pack with a HUGE maple leaf patch
sewn
on the back. Meaning, "I'm a white Anglo, even though I have no
European
accent I'm and NOT AMERICAN."

After all, Canadians are European, not North Americans. Just look at
there
money.

God save the queen!

--


http://home.earthlink.net/~harp357/

"A noble spirit embiggens the smallest man."
- Jebidiah Springfield
______________________________________
All outgoing messages scanned to be virus free
by NIS 2004.


"Mean Mr Mustard" wrote in message
m...
Unfortunately, I drew the short straw and will be heading to Europe on
a business trip this summer. Now my primary concern is just making
sure I get through this trip and back to the US safely in one piece.
I figure this will be a challenging task with all the reports of
anti-American protests and assaults on American tourists.

That said I'm trying to compile a list of tactics that will prevent me
from being a target:

1. Never dress casual - I figure most Americans can be spotted a mile
away by something "wrong" with their wardrobe. Tailored English suit
should help keep me out of trouble.
2. No shouting or raised voices - Always speak at a level tone
3. Show no emotion - No laughing, no smiling, no signs of frustration
or desperation.
4. Do not leave the hotel except for business - When the business
meetings are over, head straight back to the hotel and stay there.
5. No American greetings - "Hey", "Hi", "Howdy" and "Yo" are banned.
6. No hand gestures when talking - especially no pointing
7. Walk upright; do not flail arms too wildly when walking.
8. "Bob's Your Uncle" - Rumor has it that this phrase will stop an on
coming mob of hooligans in their tracks but I haven't confirmed this?
9. Correct words - "petrol" instead of "gas" or "fag" instead of
"cigarrette"
10. Little Canadian flag lapel pin - Last resort, but I think the
Europeans would just assume I'm an American trying to fool them with a
little Canadian flag pin.

Any other suggestions?