How do I avoid looking and acting American while traveling in Europe?

"Welsh Witch" wrote in message
news
Edwardized

Yes!! Why don't you take a Welsh woman with you.

That would have to be the best offer to date on the old Internet.
Now me being too old to travel, I'll not be leaping to my feet and shouting
"LET ME! LET ME!"
But I will, with your kind permission, indulge in a bit of fantasy.

Fantasy Mode on
Sigh!
Fantasy Mode off


They have plenty to say in a notably different accent from American and
would like a trip
abroad:-)
Just don't wear loud check trousers please! AND hey come
on....there is more than one sort of English person and not many of us
would say "fag" at least not unless you're still at school :-)
I think
you're being a bit paranoid loads of us LOVE the sunshine American
people. You'd certainly be very welcome here. Come and have a look at
Wales! Made me smile at your assessment of your compatriots...Have a nice
holiday...

"Turlough" wrote in message
...
Padraig Breathnach wrote:
Turlough wrote:


If the average Yank lost 25 stone, he'd fall through his arsehole and
hang himself. 20 years ago or so, I spotted a McDonalds in Dublin. I
recall saying to my wife, "Give them a generation or two, and the
Europeans will be sporting the huge arses they accuse us of." I should
have taken up fortune telling...


So you suggest that it is McDonald's that are responsible?


Not McDonald's per se, but the entire American diet. The results of
studies on 2nd and 3rd generation Oriental-Am's has shown that the
change to a western diet was a leading factor in increased cases of
obesity and diabetes among that group. Urbanization, which usually leads
to a decrease in normal daily exercise, and poverty are also relevant
factors.

But also increased height, Turlough, at least among the Japanese.
Must have something to do with good red meat.

Welsh Witch wrote:

have been reports of attacks on US tourists.

**************************
Maria. Where have you been? If I go on the search engine I use it will
throw up this "Your request has returned over 1000 items so reword it
please"
What about Bali,I know Ausies were there too but also Americans and the
blowing up int Africa...or do you just mean Europe?
***********************************************


But the trouble with that is you're getting multiple hits for single
events. I've just tried "Lockerbie bombing" (with quote marks so it's
searching for that exact phrase) and Google's given me 13,300 hits even
though there was only one Lockerbie bombing.

Steve

(Mean Mr Mustard) wrote:
snip
10. Little Canadian flag lapel pin - Last resort, but I think the
Europeans would just assume I'm an American trying to fool them with a
little Canadian flag pin.

Any other suggestions?

11. At least TRY to know your own way around before you ask "can you
help me, I'm an American". Buy a good map, buy a compass.
12. Don't wear complex shoes with all kinds of fiddly bits and colors
on it, keep it simple. I don't recommend sandals.
13. Don't wear white shorts. If you have to wear shorts, choose a darker color.
14. Don't wear a fashionable new sporty bag, use a simple bag or a plastic bag.
15. Don't wear flashy sunglasses, use something more conservative. If you're
not wearing it put it away, don't put it on your head.
16. Leave your intricate big sports watch at home, choose a plain model.
17. Don't wear jewelry.
18. Don't be fat !
19. Travel in a smaller car.
20. Don't over do your hair.
21. Try to pretend you know what you're doing. You can always spot an
American from the look of their eyes: like a small wild animal lost
in a scary big world. Don't be scared. If you have to, first try to
figure out where all the shops and eating establishments are, being
an American: once you can forage you'll probably feel more relaxed
and we'll notice that. :-) Another great way to avoid looking lost
is knowing a few things about Europe. Clue: it's not much different
from the USA.
22. Leave all your pistols home (they're illegal here.)
23. Be polite. If someone helps you that is just out of his goodness,
and not your right to demand as "an American". Try to show you appreciate
the trouble someone is putting in for you by trying to limit that
trouble: pay close attention when people talk to you. Don't over do the
thank-you's afterwards.
24. Figure out in which parts of Europe waiters expect a tip and in which
they don't, and how much. In Holland it is not costume, though it will
be appreciated.
25. Don't wear the American flag, don't wear articles with "sports" written
on them. We may wear them, but if you do that is too much of a giveaway.
26. NEVER walk to the fridge in someone else's home, and take what you need
not even with friends (unless they're American).
If you want something, say something like "shouldn't we get something
to eat ?". Or "I'm thirsty, can i drink something ?." Or "I'm thirsty,
do you have some water ?".
27. When you go to the McDonald's, order medium or small drink, not large.
28. Don't be seen drinking soft-drinks at all in public. Drink coffee or tea
instead. When you want to eat in public, emphasize the coziness of the
experience, not the feeding frenzy.
29. Don't be too hysterical.
--

It is obvious from your lest and probably you demeanor that you are an
"American," so there is no point in trying to hide it.

In general, people don't mind you being an "American" as much as people
mind being insulted. Pay attention to people and be courteous and
people will reciprocate.

John Mullen

Mean Mr Mustard wrote:

Unfortunately, I drew the short straw and will be heading to Europe on
a business trip this summer. Now my primary concern is just making
sure I get through this trip and back to the US safely in one piece.
I figure this will be a challenging task with all the reports of
anti-American protests and assaults on American tourists.

That said I'm trying to compile a list of tactics that will prevent me
from being a target:

1. Never dress casual - I figure most Americans can be spotted a mile
away by something "wrong" with their wardrobe. Tailored English suit
should help keep me out of trouble.
2. No shouting or raised voices - Always speak at a level tone
3. Show no emotion – No laughing, no smiling, no signs of frustration
or desperation.
4. Do not leave the hotel except for business – When the business
meetings are over, head straight back to the hotel and stay there.
5. No American greetings – "Hey", "Hi", "Howdy" and "Yo" are banned.
6. No hand gestures when talking – especially no pointing
7. Walk upright; do not flail arms too wildly when walking.
8. "Bob's Your Uncle" – Rumor has it that this phrase will stop an on
coming mob of hooligans in their tracks but I haven't confirmed this?
9. Correct words - "petrol" instead of "gas" or "fag" instead of
"cigarrette"
10. Little Canadian flag lapel pin - Last resort, but I think the
Europeans would just assume I'm an American trying to fool them with a
little Canadian flag pin.

Any other suggestions?

What's wrong with being American?

If someone has a problem with that then that is their own problem not
yours.

While In Europe stick in white, Christian, European zones, avoid
ghettos, Arabs or anyone who looks a little dusky, wears a long shirt
and is ticking.

If in Britain avoid parts of big cities, such as Manningham in
Bradford, Glodwick in Oldham, anywhere in Birmingham etc, they have
many Muslims and the police are not allowed to give assistance if you
are accosted.

You should in general be OK in Europe with Europeans and the British.
Good luck.

On Sun, 06 Jun 2004 15:55:30 +0200, Magda wrote:

On Sun, 6 Jun 2004 13:35:30 +0100, in rec.travel.europe, "The Rifleman"
arranged some electrons, so they looked like this :


... I was watching him on telly at the D-Day remembrance yesterday. He
... looked like a grinning loon!
...
... He is an inbred grinning loon and so is his ****ty son for going to play
... golf instead of going to normandy.

William is playing golf ??

Can Billy really play?

On 5 Jun 2004 23:15:24 -0700, (Mean Mr Mustard)

typed:

Unfortunately, I drew the short straw and will be heading to Europe on
a business trip this summer. Now my primary concern is just making
sure I get through this trip and back to the US safely in one piece.
I figure this will be a challenging task with all the reports of
anti-American protests and assaults on American tourists.

depends on the country....
in some, the best thing for you to do would be to paint
a broad yellow stripe down your back.....
or perhaps you are already provided....
if you don't know in which countries this is appropriate...stay home....

--
web site at www.abelard.org - news and comment service, logic,
energy, education, politics, etc 750,000 document calls yearly
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
all that is necessary for [] walk quietly and carry
the triumph of evil is that [] a big stick.
good people do nothing [] trust actions not words
only when it's funny -- roger rabbit
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Maria" wrote in message
...
On Sun, 6 Jun 2004 09:49:45 +0100, "The Rifleman"
wrote:



Any other suggestions?

Grow some balls and walk like a man

That is something we Brits would respect.



What is 'walking like a man'? John Wayne?

Hell no!, he didn't walk he minced:-)))))))

"Mean Mr Mustard" wrote in message
m...
Unfortunately, I drew the short straw and will be heading to Europe on
a business trip this summer. Now my primary concern is just making
sure I get through this trip and back to the US safely in one piece.
I figure this will be a challenging task with all the reports of
anti-American protests and assaults on American tourists.

That said I'm trying to compile a list of tactics that will prevent me
from being a target:

1. Never dress casual - I figure most Americans can be spotted a mile
away by something "wrong" with their wardrobe. Tailored English suit
should help keep me out of trouble.
2. No shouting or raised voices - Always speak at a level tone
3. Show no emotion - No laughing, no smiling, no signs of frustration
or desperation.
4. Do not leave the hotel except for business - When the business
meetings are over, head straight back to the hotel and stay there.
5. No American greetings - "Hey", "Hi", "Howdy" and "Yo" are banned.
6. No hand gestures when talking - especially no pointing
7. Walk upright; do not flail arms too wildly when walking.
8. "Bob's Your Uncle" - Rumor has it that this phrase will stop an on
coming mob of hooligans in their tracks but I haven't confirmed this?
9. Correct words - "petrol" instead of "gas" or "fag" instead of
"cigarrette"
10. Little Canadian flag lapel pin - Last resort, but I think the
Europeans would just assume I'm an American trying to fool them with a
little Canadian flag pin.

Any other suggestions?


What assaults on American tourists? I spend three months a year in Europe
and have never seen this. You should stay home until you grow some balls.
Your disgusting and an embarrassment to all real Americans.

Ryan